Sunday, June 6, 2010

Some People Come Into Your Life For a Reason

I had a little Godwink today. For some reason, I opened up the newspaper to the Obituary page. Sweetie asked me if someone's name was there so my eyes glanced down the page. I didn't catch it at first, then a name I knew well popped out at me. I probably would have missed it without a little nudge from above.

A woman whom I credit as being one of my life savers passed away Thursday. At a time in my life when I thought I was drowning in a sea of emotions and teenage angst, "Maggie" tossed me a life preserver. She gave me a safe place to speak my truth, before I even knew I had a truth. But I had a voice. In Maggie's office I was given permission to speak without judgement or condemnation.

Doctor Maggie was a psychiatrist. Since this was the 60's I think she may have been a woman before her time. I really knew nothing about her other than \she was quite tall, and she was unafraid to wear "high" heels. Not quite Sex in the City stilettos, but shoes that put her well over 6 feet, especially if you count the few inches of teased up hair.

At a time when I simply wanted to fit in I was taller than most girls/women I knew. Slouching was a way of trying to shrink myself to a less noticeable height. Stand up straight was a mantra thrown at me by my parents. Perhaps Maggie was placed on my path as an example of how to be a woman of stature, one to look up to. The last time I saw her, in line at the grocery store, she appeared much smaller. Older and retired, there was probably no need for high heels. But her hair was still nicely coiffed and her lipstick still fire engine red.

Since there is not much opportunity to speak privately while groceries pile on top of each other as the conveyor belt moves them toward the cashier. We exchanged pleasantries, smiled at shared memories, then paid for our items and went our separate ways.

I should have told her she made a big difference in my life.
I should have said thank you.

Instead of words, my gratitude will have to take the shape of lessons learned:

Seek help.
Be gentle.
Stand tall.
I'm okay.

Rest in peace, my friend.

Wishing for you a helping hand when you need it,
Merry ME


AkasaWolfSong said...

Godwink yes...Maggie wink definitely! I am sure she is proud to have helped you grow into your own Mary...because when I think of you I see and hear a woman of mighty stature who also shares her heart with others, and helps us to grow into our own too.

You can be assured Maggie knows your heart right now...

Bless You Maggie for showing Mary those truths of herself she may otherwise have never known. Bless you Mary for listening and absorbing and shining a bright light for others.

Anonymous said...

My condolences to you. Lately, I find myself thinking a lot about those people who were guideposts and life preservers on my path -- important, important.
Thank you for sharing her with us.

Constance said...

Angels show up in our lives, beacons of light and inspiration for us, showing us how to put our feet on the part of the path...
Maggie was definite;y in your life for a reason - I am glad you calimed in.
May she rest in peace among the beloved.
AkasaWolfSong and dreamphemera said it well.