Friday, June 25, 2010

A Big Chill Moment

"When the night has come
And the land is dark,
And the moon is the only light we'll see,
I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid,
Just as long as you stand, stand by me."

Last week Patty put up a link to a video that I really love. I have played it over and over again.
In a rare moment yesterday, I found myself alone. Dad was asleep, Sweetie in the pool. I decided I needed a some music to go along with the solitude. So I set my computer on the ironing board (which sits in the middle of the room, next to the ironing pile with the supposed intent to inspire me to get the job done, ha!), turned up the volume and started dancing. All by myself, feeling the music, letting the beat guide my movements.

In my reverie I didn't hear Sweetie come in the back door. I sensed rather then saw him. My heart became aware of his presence. I opened my eyes and the man I adore was dancing with me. Neither of us spoke. We didn't need words. We let our bodies do the talking.

If you read my blog on a regular basis you can probably tell I've been sort of hard to live with lately. Sweetie told me I'm would up tighter than the broken garage door spring. The whole time I'm trying to be loving, patient, and compassionate I'm also a bit more than tired, moody, harried, anxious, with a dash of anger thrown in to the mix to keep things interesting. Mostly my Sweetie is tolerant and helpful. Sometimes he gets angry too. Usually we know how to communicate pretty well, but sometimes an undercurrent of unspoken anger gets us out of sync. Not the kind of anger where verbal arrows are flung at each other or the chill in the air can refreeze the Arctic icecap. It's more a kind of blase pissiness that makes you want to call each other poopoo head instead of kissing each other goodnight. And when you do kiss your lips hardly touch and you fall asleep before you say "I love you more than ......."

The good news is that, for me and I hope for Sweetie, all that icky-ness evaporated while we danced around the room. Later on, when Dad fell we worked together in a renewed harmony to make sure he was okay. We're a team, Sweetie and I. A good one. Sometimes life gets in the way and one or the other of us forgets. I'm glad we don't forget for long.

I think I can guarantee that if click here you are going to stop whatever it is you are doing and start to dance. Enjoy!

Wishing for you somebody to stand by you when you're not feeling your usual sunny self,
Merry ME


Fire Byrd said...

I was alright reading this till the last sentence.
I have my boys, I have my sister and I have my friends.
But sometimes in the dark of the night they are not enough and I wish I was been held. And I miss my parents and wish for that love that you have with sweetie for myself.
Maybe one day again...

Pamela Jones said...

Oh, I won't be, I won't be afraid, just as long as you stand...stand by me! Dancin' with you Sister!

AkasaWolfSong said...

Gosh darn it Mary...why can't I ever read anything of yours without boohooing! I love that song and I love that your Sweetie just pulled you to him and danced.
Now that's the stuff movies are made of, (whereby I weep then too, lol)!

Wishing for you many more of those dancing moments!

P.S. I'm like Byrd and wish there was someone I could dance with or just be is hard to go through every day without human touch.

LindyLouMac said...

Good morning Mary. I am introducing myself and visiting your blog as I am a fellow contributor to the fun new collective Beautiful World

Your post is very moving. I am so grateful that life has given me a loving and supportive husband.