Embrace The Suck

"A bird does not sing because he has an answer. He sings because he has a song." Joan Walsh Anglund [A Cup of Sun, 1967] This is not the best picture in the world. It's as close as my camera on the longest zoom could get. I discovered, however, if you click on the actual picture you get a much clearer view of this singer who sounded like a bird version of Pavarotti. I think I've seen this guy on the bird feeder. If I had to guess I'd say he's not very old. His head feathers stand up like a mohawk. Do birds use mousse? Enjoying Spring, and hoping you are too. Merry ME

"Nature often holds up a mirror so we can see more clearly the ongoing processes of growth, renewal and transformation in our lives." Almost every day I drive by this pond. Usually there is this big grey goose sitting on the bank, or floating serenely soaking up the afternoon sun. The pond is along side of the much traveled road. In order to take a picture I have to drive past, park in a nearby parking lot then walk back. I knew this is where I'd find a reflection picture, I just didn't want to go to the trouble. As I drove by yesterday, I saw a turtle. A BIG turtle. Well, not tortoise size, but bigger than the ones I've seen in my neighborhood. Big enough to spy as I drove by at 30 mph. He was taking a dirt bath! Flipping dirt up over his back and getting it everywhere but his back! That was all I needed to finally take action. I went to the Post Office then headed back to the pond with my camera. I wasn't gone 10 minutes, but there was no turtle in sight. An...

"The decision to kiss for the first time is the most crucial in any love story. It changes the relationship of two people much more strongly than even the final surrender; because this kiss already has within it that surrender." Emil Ludwig (German Biographer and writer) Thanks to Susan Boyle, of recent British Idol fame, the word "gobsmacked" has become part of my vocabulary. It's not an every day word yet, but it's fun to say. I didn't really even know what it meant, so I looked it up. To be honest I was a little surprised to find it in the dictionary. But there it was right in between gobshite and gobstopper ! Dictionary.com defines gobsmacked as "utterly astounded." I was having a conversation the other day with one of my favorite people. She told me about meeting someone new. In her words, shortly after he "chatted me up" we exchanged "contact information." "I'm gobsmacked!" she said with a smile in her v...

This lady was a visitor at our church today. She is 96 years old. She's been going to a church down the street for over 60 years, but she doesn't get there often because she has to go with her daughter who goes to a smaller church. She said, when she comes to St. Luke's it's like she's been to church! Apparently she does not shy away from the Hispanic influence and salsa beat of the music. She also told me she doesn't like to have her picture taken anymore because she's always surprised at how old she is! When I asked her if I could could take her picture she said, "I didn't shave this morning" but smiled right away. I told her I was glad to know that people in their 90's still know how to smile. She said she's still pretty happy and finds things to smile about all the time. She's in a Corn Cob band and invited me to a concert. Said she plays the funnel! God bless her. When I'm an old woman, I won't need to wear purple if ...

"Kindness is the golden chain by which society is bound together." Johann Wolfgang con Goethe My blog friend, Terri St. Cloud, is very close to someone who has been hit with a double whammy.. Not one but two kinds of cancer. She's written some insightful posts on her blog about taking her friend to chemotherapy. It makes me send up prayers of gratitude for my health. Another of Terri's readers has offered this suggestion (copied directly from Terri's post): ...was thinking about your friend yesterday..... and I had a thought.... when my best friend's mother was going through her chemo/radiation treatments, one of her friends started creating "links of love" for her. She had a whole bunch of her friends take these strips of paper and write messages on them- prayers, quotes, thinking of you's, little funnies, etc. And then her friends had their friends write them. And then their friends had their friends do it... and so on and so on. Then she to...

The following is excerpted from today's Daily Love message (dailylove.com): "Today we celebrate Earth Day. As we continue to head closer to Unity consciousness we will all become more aware and active towards helping to preserve our environment,and this is good. But the best way for us to save the planet is to save ourselves. Each one of us is a microcosm of the macro Earth and represents our own planet if you will. Just as the whole of our body is made up of 75-100 trillion cells, so to is the Earth made up of 6.77 billion human beings. The health of each cell either adds or detracts to the overall health of your body. If enough cells grow sick the body will grow sick as well. The same can be said for us and the Earth. Since we have been given the powers of thought, intuition and conscious choice we are the caretakers of this Planet we all share. Your job is to be as happy and healthy as you can be - your happiness will rub off on others helping them to find happiness thus cr...

"Life can be seen through your eyes but it is not fully appreciated until it is seen through your heart. " Mary Xavier As you know I follow several different blogs. It's like a habit - once you get hooked, it's hard to break it! But there are so many cool people out there writing and posting pictures and sharing ideas. The blogosphere has become my little corner of the world. Sweetie commented recently that we had kind of stopped talking to one another and I had to ask myself if I'm turning away from the spoken word with people I know, or am turning to the Internet for relationships and the written word. When I told my love, "if you want to know what I'm feeling read my blog," I realized I might have crossed over a line. I'm going to have to watch myself. --- This morning something happened that really, really pissed me off. That dear sweet man who I wrote so lovingly about yesterday set my blood to boiling. It wasn't intentional, I know that...

"Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. William Jennings Bryan Today is my Sweetie's birthday. I'm learning that even men who profess to be too old for celebrations, too grown-up for presents, and too worldly for songs sung in their honor love to be treated to all the pomp and circumstance that a birthday brings with it. Last night we celebrated with Father/Brother Georges whose birthday was on the 13th. [Photo L: Can a priest have too many bottles of Ouzo?] We split the difference and went out together for the traditional gorging of ourselves. Good food, good company, not so good birthday pie. What's that song, 2 out of three ain't bad? The boys said the pie (which I made, not the restaurant) had just the right amount of tartness, but I translate that into it was way too sour. An hour after I ate a piece my mouth was still puckered. As f ar as I'm concerned, it was a good thi...

April 15, 2009 Big Day! 1. It's Sweetie's birthday. More later. 2. It's tax day. I got mine done at the last minute and send off a hefty check. It will be nice if it is returned to me in the form of some kind of stimulus package. My sister, Judy, is a hard-working CPA. We rarely see her from the beginning of the year til today. She is overworked and tired. Let's all heave a collective sigh that at midnight tonight she'll be able to go home and get a little rest. Not much because people who play with numbers for a living, have a constant supply of late returns to file and deadlines to meet. 3. It's sheep shearing day at Bedlam Farms. If you go to http://blog.bedlamfarm.com/ and click on Farm Journal you will get a photo log of the day's happenings. The father/daughter team of shearers arrives around 2pm to start the de-wooling process. But from what photos that have already come across my computer the Jon and the dogs have been up early in preparation for th...

Happy Easter! Springtime greetings to you and yours, Merry ME

“the tragic or the humorous is a matter of perspective" Arnold Beisser I had a friend who was always telling me, "it's a matter of perspective." At the time I thought it was pure wisdom, but now, for the life of me, I can't even remember what he was talking about! In a recent blog, Terri St. Cloud wrote about making lemonade from lemons. In regards to a slight screw up with an order she'd made, Terri wrote: what struck me was they weren't lemons at all. but you only knew that if you looked at them from the right angle. it's all in the angle, isn't it???? I'm reminded of a really dark time in my life. I coped as best I could, but eventually downed a couple bottles of OTC sleep aids. My thought was not so much to kill myself as to have the freedom to lie down and go to sleep til my pain was over. I know, it doesn't make much sense and it didn't make sense then either, but I was hurting and was oh so tired. A peaceful sleep is not exact...

For those who were interested, everything went off as planned yesterday. Made me wonder what all the fuss was about. I went to writing group, Dad got breakfast, the nurse came 10 minutes after I got home. It was rather good timing if I do say so myself. I do have to admit that halfway through my stinging writing critique the thought crossed my mind that I didn't need to leave the house for this! But don't get me wrong. The women in my group are really, really good writers, and way smarter than I am. That's the truth not a put down to me. What I had thrown together as a fluff piece was read much more seriously than I imagined. What I learned, and thats the whole point isn't it, is that writing isn't just about putting words together so they sound good. If it's not coming from my own experience, then I better have a well-defined point of view and do some research to back me up. Writing about a marketing boardroom is so far out of my league that the joke seemed ...

I live in a little bit of a bubble. If it doesn't happen on Cold Case, HGTV or inside the Cash Cab, chances are I'm not going to be real aware of what is going on in the world. I try to steer clear of newspapers and news TV because let's face it, it's too darned depressing. Thus I am a little late in finding out that Dan Seals died last month from lymphoma. Dan Seals the country singer and former partner of John Ford Coley, not the Illinois politician. Wekeki broke the news this morning. I am feeling very sad. I can't say I was as much of a Seals follower, as say my man John Denver, but there are two or three of his songs that make my toes tap when they come on the Country Classics Radio station my father listens to when he's napping. Trisha Yearwood sings, "the song remembers when." When I hear "I want to bop with you baby," I am transported in time. I am immediately in my living room in San Diego, dancing with my daughter, trying hard to re...

He said: Tonya is coming at 10 am. I said: I won't be here. I've got my writing group. He said: Call her back and reschedule it. I said: Why? I don't think I need to be here. We discussed this when she was here last week. We all agreed I didn't need to be here. He said: Well, I thought you wanted to be involved. I said (rather incredulously): That was below the belt. He said: I don't know what you're talking about. Silence: He said: Call her back and schedule for 9:30. I said: I will, but why does it have to be a problem. He said: You were pretty short with me. I said: You were pretty short with me. Why would you say I don't want to be involved? I'll call. I'll reschedule. If Tonya can't change the time, I won't go to the meeting. He said: Well that sounds okay then. Is it just me, or did I just get hoodwinked? The man fights dirty. Uses words to wound then acts all hurt if they boomerang. Why do I always forget? Why is it such a big deal? Gu...

Sweetie and I went to a new Art fair/farmer's market on Sunday. There were way to many people for this clautrophobe. But it was a beautiful day and nice to get out by ourselves. I say this photo opportunity and decided to take it. I think the bottom that belongs to the guy in blue jeans was engrossed in conversation and thus did not realize a strange woman was taking a picture of his bottom. Actually I was not zeroing in on his bottom at all. It was all about the black labber. I have to say I don't really understand the new phenomenon of taking your dog to crowded art shows. Do dogs enjoy art? Do they enjoy being dragged along on a pink sequined studded leash, in and out and around all the people, where there are few good places to smell or pee? Actually I don't get the whole doggy day care, take your dog to work day or treat your dog like a person thing. Maybe I've been reading too many Bedlam Farm posts. Katz loves his dogs but keeps them in their canine place. Speak...

"We Are Connected The Pond is the World Your Heart is the Pebble" www.humanityhealing.net I'm not sure why but I got up feeling kind of crabby this morning, just a little off. I almost bit Sweetie's head off when I discovered his idea of "brown and serve" sausage is different from mine. He looked at me kind of funny, then decided to let me over the sausage cooking. Usually, I'm a little more grateful for his being the one to step up to the stove and get breakfast going. I hate it when my crabbiness spills over on the people I love. So I'm standing there waiting for the frozen links to cook and I read this headline: "Afghan president signs law to allow marital rape." I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. How is it that something that happens on the other side of the world from me has the power to make my stomach ache? No, here's the real question. How is it that in the year of our Lord 2009, there is even one women left on this p...