Embrace The Suck

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. ” Margaret Mead Along with the design changes I've made on my blog, I've also added a button. Or maybe it's a gadget. I'm not quite sure of the difference or how exactly to get a button from one blog to another. I've kind of mastered gadget editing so that is how I added the We Can logo to my sidebar. If you don't ever wander around to the places I suggest that's okay. What I like might not be your cup of tea. But I ask you gently, no.... with a bit of a nudge .... no, with a fervent plea ... to check out Dr. Maithri Goonetilleke's new web site for Possible Dreams International . I originally found The Soaring Impulse by blog jumping. Once there, when I read of the work this man and his small band of volunteers is doing in Swaziland I want to weep with joy and desire to help too. Seriously Maithri is a doctor, poet, fund ra...

"Life is a process. We are a process. The universe is a process." Anne Wilson Schaef Apparently getting this blog to look the way I want it to is also a process. I'm not even sure why I've been messing with the templates. But it's kind of like starting a new computer game (Jig saw puzzles, Spot the difference, Find the hidden object, etc). Once I get started it's hard to stop. I sit down after dinner, turn the computer on and start playing with the look of this blog instead of writing deep meaningful posts. What's that all about? Oh well, I'm pretty sure that mixed in with all the fluff up there in my brain there are some deep meaningful thoughts left. I just haven't been in touch with them lately. Till then I'm wishing for you a day of sunny skies and this sage advice: Don't follow anyone else's template for your life. Make your own. Blessings, Merry ME

"For most of us, no one provided a more vital link to our heritage and family history than our grandparents. The wisdom of our elders is irrefutable." Jack Levine* Dad slept in this morning. Sweetie was working in his office. My Romeo cat slept on the back of the couch where I sat with the computer on my lap. The house was quiet. I used the time to check my email and catch up on my favorite blogs. I was particularly delighted by Dani's story at Three Sister's Spirit . You really must go read the tale she told about one woman's less than well-kept home. I laughed out loud and knew that on any given day it might be me whose house looks vandalized. I admit I'm not the best housekeeper in the world. In her post, Dani's went on to share this piece of her great-grandmother's wisdom: "If you do nothing else each day, at least make sure your kitchen sink is clean and shining, and keep some fresh flowers by the faucet. " It got me to thinking. I ha...

I've had some time to think about it but I'm still not sure I can come up with 7 things you might find interesting about me. My Sweetie says if you ask him he could come up with and endless number. To that I'd have to say the man is not only remarkable but a tad prejudiced. 1. It's pretty obvious that I like to write. Some days it's like there are all kinds of words swirling around in my head and I can't get them out fast enough. Other days there's nothing. 2. I've heard it said that the streets of heaven are paved with gold. I guess there's no way of knowing that until we get there. However, I am pretty sure that prime rib swimming in au jus is served on a regular basis. And for dessert there's bound to be something made of chocolate. 3. Up until this afternoon I was pretty sure my boy cat wanted to marry me. When he is sure that nothing in the room is going to move or make a noise he seeks me out, whispers sweet meows in my ear and marks me as ...

"Being selected Most Improved was a special individual award because when I speak to young people I always try to tell them the importance about it's not where you start but where you end up. " Kevin Johnson, NBA player I started out my last post by telling you of the award(s) I got from Fyrebird. Then, as is often the case, I got lost in some other thought and never mentioned the award again. Please don't think that means I'm not honored. In fact I'm quite puffed up! Receiving an award for being "Kreativ" from a person whose creativity I admire is quite an honor. Thanks Byrd. However, it also makes me a little nervous. My immediate thought (after Woohoo, they like me, they really like me!) was am I worthy? I am beginning to realize this nonsense is a broken record that gets played regardless of any success I might have. It doesn't mean as much to me as it once did, but before I can move on I have to beat myself up a little or tease me to keep me...

"Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it." Today is my lucky day! I received a blog award and got "pinked." Both gifts came out of the blue from the same blogging friend - Mandy, aka Fyrebird. Remember all that whining I did about never getting an award? What I didn't realize then, was that I just had to wait for the right ones to come along. I also learned that sitting around waiting is never very fun or easy. It's like the difference between adults and children when waiting for Christmas morning to arrive. Adults scurry around wishing for one more week. Kids, on the other hand, dance around a twinkling tree and beg to shake a box or two. In the case of the blog award I made a decision not to wait passively. I took some action by putting my own "You Rock" award out there. I have had great fun sending it to people - some bloggers, some not - I, "Quee...

[Note: I like to find a quote that goes along with what I'm going to write about. I think I may have stumped even google. There does not seem to be any appropriate quote for "I-hung-out-with-my-exhusband-and-was-surprisingly-very-comfortable-and-at-ease."] "Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from. I never regret anything that has happened to me in my life, whether it is making a bad choice, deciding to do something I shouldn't have, saying the wrong thing or not doing something I should have done... because all of these things have given me the knowledge I have today and helped make me who I am today... and that is one thing I will never regret." Al Franken Life can be weird sometimes; take some strange twists and turns. But somehow I believe we always end up where we are supposed to be. ...

While the we and the vacationers were at the Olive Garden eating our farewell dinner a quick but torrential storm blew over. Upon leaving the restaurant the children, being children, discovered a cascade of water coming off the roof. Although Chloe didn't stay completely dry, I think these photos clearly show the chromosomal differences between boys and girls. There is something about that XY pairing that makes anything wet, muddy, loud, creepy, fast-moving, and/or stinky just about as much fun as Christmas morning! See for yourself. "A child reminds us that playtime is an essential part of our daily routine." Anonymous "Her smile beams like sunshine, which fills our hearts with love." Birgit B . I rest my case, Merry ME

"In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat." Warren Eckstein Yesterday was a long day. Just when I thought I couldn't cry or sleep anymore, I closed the book I was trying to read through swollen, puffy eyelids and rolled back over into what I thought would be la la land. Sweetie lay beside me, lulling me to sleep with the rythym of his pretzel crunching. His reading light was tilted away from me, yet it still shone like a beacon lighting up the room. I pulled the covers over my head in the time tested way of darkening my space. Most nights the cats wait for us to get settled before they come in and get themselves comfortable. Girl Cat, aka Cry Baby, and more recently Fatty Catty, is not the least bit shy. She leaps on the bed with the greatest of ease, walks the path between Sweetie's legs and mine, ducks under - or over- my book, and plops herself down across my chest. Once there, she closes her eyes and falls into a deep slee...

"Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it." Albert Smith I've been feeling tired for a week. I've been on the verge of tears since the visitors left. I've been feeling at sixes and sevens, whatever that means. I've been thinking it was all related to a change of pace I'm not used to. Is it possible I've turned into that much of a wimp? Today, after a rather stressful morning, the tears came. Like the wolf at the door of the three little pigs, I've been expecting them. As usual, they brought with them an overwhelming desire to hide in my room, under the covers. Dad and I had words. Not bad words or mean words. Just a string of miscommunications. I tried not saying anything for fear of saying the wrong thing. I listened as Dad talked of his pain and sadness. "Yeh, but what about me?" my inner child blubbered. Through my tears and my weariness I tried to reassure both the child and my father. Not really kn...

"Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person - having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away. Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859 [Note from ME: When I started writing this blog I tried to protect the identity of people I was writing about. It's one thing for me to spill my guts and something else again to write about people who may or may not want to be mentioned - at least by name. So I've given most of the people of whom I write a pseudonym. Nothing too highly veiled. If you know me you probably know who I'm writing about. For some reason that I can no longer even recall, I chose to refer to the main man in my life, my SO (significant other), my main squeeze, my paramour as "Sweetie. " Personally I like it. But I ...

"There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered. Nelson Mandela Dictionary.com defines vacation as " a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel ." Clark Griswold (aka Chevy Chase in National Lampoon's 1983 movie Vacation) calls it a " quest for fun ."as in " I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun. We're all gonna have so much f*#!*!g fun we'll need plastic surgery to remove our gd smiles." The West coast vacationers who just spent a week here in sunny (except for the late afternoon and middle of the night thunder storms) Florida might not have had much rest or relaxation, but they had plenty of travel. And fun? While I hope they enjoyed themselves, fun is mostly in the eye of the beholder, don't you think? For the parents of six-year old twins traveling cannot be easy. If it was just the kids ...

"You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them." Desmond Tutu Big changes occurred yesterday in the Wichansky family. In an instant Elliot and his sister Alice appeared in the world and nothing will ever be the same. Friends and family have been standing by waiting for all these months. The time for excited hand-wringing is now over. Now those of us who love this family need to roll up our sleeves and pitch in. There will be lots to do: feed, hold, and rock the new babies, entertain Big Sister Ivy Jane, cook dinners, wash clothes, and finish building the basement, i.e. the nursery! It's hard for me to imagine how one mother and one father can possibly do everything that needs to be done in the coming days. But this is a "can-do" couple. They've stared hardship in the face and still managed to smile. They are surrounded by people who love them and are willing to help. And people like me who live too far away to be hands...

"A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for." Anonymous ALICE SYLVIA WICHANSKY 8/13/2009 8:27 AM

"A new baby is like the beginning of all things-wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities." Eda J. Le Shan ELLIOT EDWARD WICHANSKY 8/13/2009 8:26 am

"This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave. " Elmer Davis I was able to get one more quilt made before my sister arrived. I'm feeling pretty proud of myself. But more than that I'm feeling a big old heart full of gratitude for the soldiers who are going to be honored at the retreat coming up in September (See July 26 post.) Not just those soldiers, but soldiers in general. I try to imagine a world where peace reigns. A world where mothers and fathers would no longer have to hug their children goodbye and send them into harms way. Where fear wouldn't keep wives and children awake at night. Where women would be safe to pursue their dreams and old men would not have nightmares of battles fought in their youth. Where testosterone-filled boys could compete with soccer balls, calculators, or rocket ships instead of AK-47's and IED's. Where govenments could spend money improving the minds and souls of their peop...

"A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by a mother who sees that the others get it. Marcelene Cox It's been awhile since my last post. I've had a few ideas of things to write about but few moments to write them. Most of last week was spent in an intensive cleaning marathon getting ready for company. Funny, I thought I'd covered every square inch of the house with a dust cloth dripping in Pledge. I looked up, last night at dinner and noticed I completely missed the cob webs on the chandelier over the dining room table. Oh well! The pins are out of the carpet which I consider a definite cleaning coup, especially after all the sewing I did. My sister, her daughters, two of her grandchildren and her son-in-law arrived for a short visit on Sunday night. The trip from the west coast is always a killer. It takes all day and a couple of plane changes to get here. Once you arrive and have had time to stretch your legs out to their normal ...

"I can think of no better way of redeeming this tragic world today than love and laughter. Too many of the young have forgotten how to laugh, and too many of the elders have forgotten how to love. Would not our lives be lightened if only we could all learn to laugh more easily at ourselves and to love one another." Theodore Hesburgh Sweetie and I watched a documentary a few nights ago that I think should be required of everyone who reaches a certain age. The problem might be in deciding what the age should be ... 50. 60. 75? At 57 I'm on the slippery slope side of middle age, looking straight at being old. Or am? Someone said, and I believe it's true, that old age is a state of mind. The movie, Young at Heart , was pretty much a commentary on the power of not giving into the aches and pains and problems of being old. If you haven't seen it rent it soon. I've known several people of advanced age in my lifetime. Some embrace their golden years with dignity and ...

"Appreciation is a wonderful thing. It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well." Anonymous Back on July 7th I wrote a whiny kind of a post about not feeling as good as other bloggers because I don't have a sidebar full of awards to show off. I ended with this bit of self-indulgent wisdom twaddle: "My new motto: If you don't get an award, give one. I'm going to start thinking about my own award to give out. Probably I'll start with me!!!!!" One of my friends from the blogosphere, Molly appeared just like a fairy godmother and offered to help me. That means she did all the work and I looked on in awe and wonder. All I really had to do was say "that's perfect!" which I did after her 2nd attempt. And it was only her second try because I changed my mind mid-stream! I am honored and pleased and very grateful to unveil the Merry ME You Rock! Award for Excellence [Drum roll please!] Is that cool or what? The award was born out...