Mirror Mirror on the Wall

"To be what we are,

and to become what we are capable of becoming,

is the only end of life."

Robert Louis Stevenson

Yesterday my friend, Dani, asked me to do a quick little exercise ... just for fun, she said. Dani, if you haven't figured it out by now, is someone whose wisdom and insight I value immensely even though we haven't officially met. So even though I wasn't sure of its purpose when she asked me to do three simple tasks, I gave it my best shot.

I found out later the exercise was one she often uses when she facilitates women's retreats. So as not to step on her toes, I'm not going to give away the questions. Like being on Jeopardy, I'll just share my answers. To say I was surprised, pleasantly surprised but surprised nonetheless, would be an understatement.

The final part of the exercise (which I'm doing here) is for me to write three sentences about myself (which comes directly from the questions.) Taken out of context, it may sound a little braggadocious. It's not about me saying how great I am. It's more about looking into the face of people I highly respect and seeing a reflection of myself. Like a personality trait bathroom mirror. Only I wasn't seeing the metaphorical chin hairs and double chins, I zeroed in on the pretty green eyes that mostly look for the good in the world.

Dani, as instructed, here is the final part of the exercise ...

I, Merry Me, am honest, faithful, fun, generous, accepting, happy, spiritual and loving.

I, Merry Me, am someone who has always been a strong, confident person, and now as I become aware of my strengths, I can look on with pride. I am a go to person who can be trusted in any situation and I love people - no matter what - and can make them feel loved.

Who knew? I'm not sure I did.

According to Dani, "In the realms of energy, (at it's purest form) like attracts like. What we are attracted to in others is a reflection of the characteristics we ourselves have. We can identify them because our ego is not involved (or so we think) in this exercise."

Along those same lines, another blog friend, Sorrow, shared with me recently something her grandfather told her when she was a little girl. It was their secret. Sorrow gave me the okay to share it here. "When we find people who inspire us, who shine in ways that make our hearts swell with love, who believe in us, encourage us, and just make the world a better place for us, it's God's way of giving us a mirror, so that we might truly see our own souls, and the way they shine."

When I read that, tears ran down my face. That happens a lot when I read really, really, really good stuff. I'm touched that this grandfather was smart enough, caring enough, to share this wisdom with a little girl who probably felt very unsure of herself. What would the world be like if every kid had a secret like this to hold close to the heart during the scary, unsure times? Actually, it would be pretty darn good if every adult knew this secret too!

Maybe I already knew it. Maybe I knew it but didn't believe it applied to me. However, it is obviously a lesson that two of God's special angels wanted me to re-learn because they spoke to me, in different ways but with the same "look in the mirror" message, on two successive days. Ah-ha! I said to myself out of the blue this morning. This mirror message + the 12 Step message = how about spending some time self-nurturing instead of always putting others first? (Working the 12 Steps is all about looking at yourself instead of blaming others)

As luck would have it when mind, body and spirit align at the same time the planets and stars are in order, I met with my writing group today. It felt great to sit with ladies of like mind sharing stories, thoughts, encouragement and laughter. It's only 4 hours a month, which seems like a drop in a great big do-for-others bucket, but I'm learning it's 4 hours very well spent. I must face the fact that being in the company of women is good for my soul.

Wishing for you time spent nurturing yourself,

Merry ME