Gratitude - Day 7


"Earth's crammed into heaven
and every common bush afire with God."
Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Aurora Leigh
Today I'm grateful for reminder of something very important to me from a past life. Well, not actually a past life, as in re-incarnation. But in the life I lived before I moved back to my Florida home back in 1995. One of the things that helped save my life and return to me some sort of sanity was being involved in a 12-Step group. I participated in CoDa (Codependents Anonymous) and Alanon before settling into a group for family and friends of drug addicts - Naranon.
Before those meetings I had turned my back on any form of religion and had no relationship to speak of with any kind of higher power. Actually I did have a twisted, angry relationship with an old fashioned God who sat on a throne in heaven and meted out punishment to all sinners. Since I was pretty sure I was a mighty sinner, I stayed away from this almighty finger pointer unless it was to rage back at Him for deserting me.
I soon found out that 12-step programs are based on a very spiritual concept - that of a higher power. The first meeting I attended I almost through up when everyone began holding hands and saying the Lord's prayer. I would have gotten up and walked out except that I was on the opposite side of the room from the door and I was too much of a people pleaser and too afraid to call attention to myself to do so. Once I wrapped my mind and my heart around the spiritual side of the program and worked through the steps I found a place of great comfort in the meetings.
I also made some really close friends. I willingly took a leap of faith and opened myself up to a group of strangers. The surprise was that no one judged me or my poor choices. Instead they nodded their heads in full understanding ... they'd "been there done that." They cried with me, laughed with me and hugged me. I learned to speak out loud in front of a group of people. I learned to share my secrets, character defects and pain. And I was loved in return.
As I type this I remember that Saturday night was meeting night. I haven't talked to most of those people in years. But I have a few girlfriends from that group whom I should pick up the phone and call. I'm so very grateful for their friendship, I think I should tell them so and see what's going on in their lives.
I started thinking about this subject because of reading Dani's blog. Dani and I have become blog buddies. We've exchanged emails and found that we have a lot in common. Not the least of these is our love for Terri St. Cloud. Dani quoted the 11th step:
“Sought through prayer and meditation
to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him,
praying only for knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out.”
and called it her personal favorite.
Prayer, meditation, conscious contact with God. These are things that can really get lost in a day that is filled with to do lists, caregiving, doing the laundry and blogging. Like Dani, I'm better at praying and asking for things then being quiet and listening for an answer.
With the news of the last couple days, I have increased my heavenly pleas for peace in this world. Who else but a power greater than all of us is going to be able to change the minds and hearts of men and women that share this planet? It will take all of us working together to make it happen. And to do that each of us might have to sit in silence and listen for "His/Her will for us."
I don't mean to sound all religious here. I have learned/am learning what works for me. While I don't know what will work for you, I feel pretty sure that each of us is created with a Divine spark and our souls are continuously looking for an opportunity to be reconnected. Wherever that is for you I encourage you to go there and listen for the small still voice that will guide you to a place of peace.
And we all said "Amen"!
Before I close this post I have to say I am also grateful for the sweet, buttery taste of avocados mixed with just the right amount of tomato an onion to make a delicious bowl of guacamole, and piping hot tortilla chips fresh from hot grease for dipping. Sweetie and I tried a Mexican food restaurant for lunch and I have to say I'm still pleasantly stuffed. Ole!
Wishing for you some time of peaceful silence and a yummalicious snack,
Merry Me
[Photo: This picture is from an email entitled God's paintbrush.]

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Every Little Bit Helps

Image
UPDATE:  I'll be picking a winner on Thanksgiving Day. So make a donation and leave your name in the comment section below.  ME UPDATE:  I see a tiny problem but it should be easy to fix. Commenting anonymously doesn't get your name in the drawing. And there's no way to tell Anonymous A from Anonymous B. Are you different or the same? I need to be able to get back in touch with you somehow. We can exchange email addy's later. But please at least leave your name. If you still comment as Anonymous, just say your name in the comment.  You can use first name and last initial. Or last name alone. Or an Alias. Just so I can get your name in the hat. And really, thank you. Thank you again and again. Merry ME _____ I always breathe a sigh of relief when a storm veers away from Jacksonville.  At the same time it's hard not to feel guilty that it went somewhere else.  I was in no way prepared for Hurricane Sandy. Like a lot of others, I felt like the...
Read more

An Easter Miracle

Image
How is it that after someone you love dies, time moves on even when it feel like its standing still? Philosophers, poets and writers have tried to answer that question since time began. I don't have the answer. I just know that, by what I can only imagine is the Grace of God, it does. When you heart is broken into something resembling a 1000 piece jig saw puzzle and there are no directions on how to put it together, somehow it mends. When some else dies and it cracks again, God stitches the old wound and the new wound together into a patchwork of healed scars. Fifteen years ago, when I watched my mother draw a breath then counted the seconds before she took another but none came, I sat by her bed and tried to imagine being a motherless child. Then I did what any kid would do, ran down the long hospital corridor sounding the alarm. "My mother isn't breathing." "My mother isn't breathing."  Want to see doctors, nurses, CNAs, and cleaning ladies tur...
Read more

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY BLOG PARTY

Image
In honor of women everywhere ... Welcome to the International Women's Day Blog Party (Turn up the sound: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuB3_HLcFfk ) International Women's Day is a global day celebrating the economic, political and social achievements of women past, present and future. To this end, this party is a way to honor those special ladies who have inspired us and made us better than we ever thought we could be. It is with gratitude and pride I welcome you to my blog. I'm anxious to hear your stories and celebrate your choices. All you have to do is go down to the bottom of this post and click on the comment section. That will take you to another page where you can write your tribute in the space provided. You can use your Google/Blogger user name or remain anonymous. There is nothing to join. If you choose to post anonymously please leave your name in the comment section so we'll all know who you are. When you're through hit publish and voila your lady is o...
Read more